Defiance One to Five

rebellious generation morguefile1850 Pair-a-Dice in the Mother Lode of California

Smiling cynically, Angel saw on one corner a man preaching salvation while on the other his brother, hat in hand, fleeced the godforsaken. Everywhere she looked, there were desperate men, exiled from home and family, seeking escape from the purgatory forged by their own decaying hopes for a future.

These same fools sought solace where they were most assured of finding none-from her.
The things that happen to little Sarah in the prologue was horrific. I imagine she is wondering where God is, why her dad didn’t want her, why God and her mom hadn’t protected her with Cloe.

Where was God when mom died? How could God let such a little innocent child of 8 become Dukes new property?

How do we reconcile God’s character as it is revealed in Scripture with the fact that horrible things happen to the innocent?

From 8 to 18 we can only imagine what a life Sarah endured. We get a quick glimpse of a lover who helped her escape the likes of Duke but only to soon lose hope and was on her own again.

Along and with no hope. Angel hated her life. She hated Pair-a-Dice, Duchess, Magowan, and she even hated her own wretched helplessness. Most of all she hated men and the relentless quest for pleasure.

She remember the words Cloe spoke to her about God’s Truth,

“All men want to do is use you. When you give them your heart, they tear it to shreds.”

An even stronger force than the hatred that feasted on her was the weariness that sucked her soul dry.

At eighteen, she was tired of living and resigned to fact that nothing would ever change. She wondered why she was even born.

For this she was born, take it or leave it. God’s Truth. Only way out was to kill herself.
Her courage failed her over and over.

No hope for Angel,

“I don’t look back, and I don’t look forward and now doesn’t exist”

Michael Hosea

“Lord, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind.”

I don’t think Angel had Michael in her mind either. But Michael knew he was going to marry that girl anyway. It was God’s Will for Michael.

All Angel knew was that this is all there was to life and if Magowan had his way her life would be over sooner than later. All Michael knew was that God had provide a wife for him. They were both in disbelief.

“I’m not here for sex.” Michael told Angel

“No? You’re her for Bible Study”

Little did she know God was at work with Michael and Angel answering prayers!

It is clear in our story that Michael and Angel both heard God and Satan speaking to them. How do you distinguish between the two voices that call you?

The only way I can silence Satan is with Gods’ Word in my heart and in my mind and in my soul daily, sometime minute by minute.

God was answering Michael Hosea’s prayers. Only not the way Michael had planned. Angel was not the wife he had prayed for. Consider the Jews and their fervent prayers for a Messiah-and how that prayer was answered through Jesus. Was He what they expected?

Angel was listening to Satan. He had managed to wipe all her hopes and dreams away. Michael was hearing God clearly but was not convinced He was right. Could God really want This Woman as his wife?

Angel was angered over the name Mara Michael gave her. He didn’t know her and what her life was like. How dare he assume things?

“You just came on one of my bad nights” Angel justified her anger but more than anger was stirring up in her.

What was it about this stubborn man that just wanted to talk? He stirred up emotions she had buried.

He spoke of a new life, one with hope. Not for her.

Hope was torment; Hope was an enemy. And this man was a thorn in her side.

Night after night Michael returned, Angel treating him like all the rest. She knew he was no different.

Or was he? Hosea’s personal questions echoed in her mind. What was keeping her here? Why didn’t she just walk out the door?

Angel decided to leave after all. But on her own with her own Gold she had made, but she had to convince Duchess and Magowan to let her leave. They were not so easily convinced and Angel soon found out the wrath of Magowan was her way out of this life. Push him far enough and he will end it all for her and she won’t need any courage. He will kill her quickly and this life will all be over shortly.

After the fourth blow, all Angel heard was the beast roaring in her ears.

Child of Darkness 1835, God’s Truth

Let get started with the Child of Darkness, Prologue in New England, 1835 as young Sarah meets her Dad for the first time.

So eager and anxious to please her handsome Daddy. Then when he isn’t pleased, she is sure it was her fault and mama was so sad.

It gets very dark as mama, who was distant for months all of a sudden is on top of the world sends poor Sarah on a trip with Cloe to the Seaside.

How sad is that? Mom chooses the Man.

Confused and worried Sarah knows that the Man she had once called Dad is coming back to visit mama and NOT Sarah. Mama’s so happy that she is willing to send her sweet child away with the likes of her maid, Cloe.

Cloe showed her true colors as she returns to a life she had left of drunkenness and bar room life when Merrick took her and used her once again, leaving young sweet innocent Sarah out in the hall vulnerable to a very scary way of life.

I was so upset and cried for her that she was left and forgotten out there all alone. Leaving there having not even seen the ocean, she was forever a changed young girl.

Her eyes were opened by Cloe telling her God’s truth.

“All men want to do is use you. When you give them your heart, they tear it to shreds. None of them care. Take your fine papa. Does he care about your mother? “

Arriving home Sarah discovered that Cloe was right once again.

Her and mama were leaving the grand home that Alex had provided and heading to a new way of life. Mama was beyond heartbroken and having to crawl back home to her parents was the last thing she had hope for.

Arriving at her grandparents’ home, humbled and in despair, it was made clear that Mama and Sarah weren’t welcome there.

Sarah finds out real quick what poor and lonely life you have without someone who loves you.

Oh, Mama tries to love Sarah and provide for her but in the end Sarah sees how Cloe was right about God’s truth once again.

At only 8 years old Sarah is all alone and without love from anyone. Heart breaking isn’t?

Moving in to the Dukes home, now orphaned, she was told things would be grand and she would be loved again and safe.

By morning, Sarah knew that Cleo had told her God’s truth about everything.

Once again God’s Truth was revealed to her in ways we aren’t even told. We are only left with our imagination of what life was like with the Duke.

I cried and cried when Rad foolishly thought he was doing the right thing.

I know this first start of the book is dark and hard to imagine yet we all know how true it can be.

I promise if you stay with it the next part “Defiance” isn’t as dark.  It will still be sad as we come to know Angel, a hard, tough, women who has come to know God’s truth to be very real.

As an  18 year old adult now in 1850, she has made sure no one can enter her life or heart.

She has only one defense and that is to never feel love again.

Because she had seen and lived what is God’s truth.

  1. Why do you think Angel’s mother stayed in a relationship that was damaging to both her and her daughter?
  2. What kept her there? Are there beliefs or attitudes that you struggle with, that you know are damaging to yourself or others? Why hold on to them?
  3. Read Psalm 116:16-17; 118:5; 119:45; 142:7; Romans 6-21-23; and Colossians 1:21-23.

Continue to read on to Defiance. Feel free to add your comments or like this post if you want.

Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers

My friend Janie had loaned me my first Francine Rivers book when I started taking Precept Classes with Debbie Harris at Shadow Mountain. I think that was 2003.  Janie and her mom had read several so every few weeks I would bring one back and trade it for another. I cannot recall all of the names of the books that first year or two that I swapped with them but I bet it was 10 or more books.

I can say I came to love anything Rivers wrote. I could see something or relate to something that all of her characters were living or doing or had endured or were facing. I have read well over 20 of her books and now rereading them again.

She is my favorite author. She writes Christian Fiction like no other. Bringing God and how He works in others’ lives that gives HOPE to the character and to the reader. Her characters are so real you will end a book missing them, wanting to be with them again, like a sister or mother. You are part of the story.

If this is your first time reading FR you are in for a real treat, a journey you will take with Sarah first, then Angel & Mara and Michael. If you are rereading it again I am sure you will remember the story but now the second time or third time you will be more in tune to details and feeling of the characters and why they chose the paths that they did. You will see more of how God was in it all along the way.

I first read Redeeming Love in January 2005 and am eager to read it again with you. Well I hope I have whet your appetite just enough to get you started.

Some of you had to purchase your book and I hope by now all of you have it in hand.

I am so happy you want to join me in this new adventure I am taking. With a break from my Precept class I felt I wanted to try blogging so here is my first attempt as I hopefully inspire you and encourage you to read along with me and a few others.

I hope you will also join in by commenting and replying to others as we do this as a community.

Feel free to share with you daughters, sisters, moms, girlfriends that might like to read along with us. That will make all the more rewarding as we all talk about how the story goes or how it affects us.

I for one can tell you that I can relate to Sarah as a child, less to Angel and Mara in her days at the Palace, but then again as a new wife a way from all family and friends with a man I had only known for two weeks when we became partners. So feel free to share your thought as we go.

Why blog and Why Redeeming Love?

This is the excerpt for your very first post.

I am taking a Precept Class coming in September 2016 on the Book of Hosea.  It is about a prophet that God requires to marry a prostitute.  In preparation for doing this study I am once again going to read Francine Rivers Redeeming Love.

I read Redeeming Love first back in 2005. I mentioned to friends if any them wanted to read it also this summer then I would be willing to open up a dialog on it and we could all benefit from each other as we read.  This is my first attempt again to blogging.  I hope you will join me in my new adventure.

I hope you will enjoy reading Redeeming Love with me and some friends.  I plan on posting weekly as we go through it together.  I will often ask some thought provoking questions in hopes for some dialog from the others following along.  I might give a testimony along the way sometimes.

As I mentioned this is my first attempt at this so please forgive me in advance for the stumbles along the way.  Feel free to remake and comment on the book or any other questions you might have.

After we read this book I have another planned for the summer but later on I will blog other kinds of things, like book reviews maybe devotions that were moving or touched me.

I don’t know where this will led me but I am following God’s nudges and pray for His Will over this adventure.  I give all I offer here to the Glory of God.  I take no credit for any wisdom or knowledge without first giving God the Praises for using me and changing me to who I am today.

I am His, now and forever and am very grateful for all He has done in my life.  More of that will show up in my blogs.

Well let’s get started.  Welcome and thanks for following me.



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Mark 6:31 “Come away by yourselves to a secluded place and rest a while.”

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